Monday, 30 July 2007

And the verdict is...

GUILTY.

I have decided that Mr Darcy is not the romantic protagonist for me. In fact, I have decided that Mr Darcy is not romantic at all. Having given the future of Mr Darcy much thought all weekend, I finally decided at 13:43 today that any man who says he doesn't want to get a bottle of one wine because it is £10 more expensive than another wine, on a third date, is setting a precedent for an ungiving future. Of course, this is not the only reason. I am also concerned that Mr Darcy lacks warmth. I'm sure it is lurking somewhere underneath the surface, but I'm not going to hang around to find out.

So now I am left with the tricky task of communicating this to Mr Darcy. Perhaps I shall send it as a brief to his office? Or, more cunningly, I could just send him a text that says: ADJOURNED.

Friday, 27 July 2007

Pride & Prejudice

Unfortunately The Owl and I did not manage to meet up on Sunday. Secretly I was relieved as I was enjoying my love affair with my sofa.

The Owl and I did, however, meet up last night for dinner. Following dinner last night, I have decided that The Owl shall no longer be called The Owl. The Owl shall now be called Mr Darcy. Mr Darcy took me to Shepherds. Shepherds is a rather eccentric little spot frequented by politicos and cabbies. I have never been to a place like that before and it was filled with people who speak with the same perfect english inflections as Mr Darcy.

Mr Darcy and I spent the evening getting further acquainted and we never ran out of things to say. This may be because we agree on very little. Whereas I can see the absolute necessity of owning a Miu Miu handbag, Mr Darcy feels that the money would be better spent elsewhere. Mr Darcy also believes that all humans are intrinsically good, whereas I believe that if one is to avoid disappointment, one should own a dog. I am very surprised that Mr Darcy feels this way about humans given he deals with very troubled people on a daily basis. Mr Darcy has quickly found out that it is very difficult to win an argument against me and did, indeed, send me a text last night saying, "you have an air of frequently being proved right about you".

Unfortunately there was no holding of hands and gazing into eyes last night. In fact, there was no hanky panky at all. Mr Darcy walked me to get a cab and we had a quick peck on the lips (mind you, this is definitely a step up from kisses on both cheeks), a brief hug and off I went.

I feel as though I am trapped in a Victorian novel. It is all terribly civilized. If I lived in the 19th century I would half expect Mr Darcy to ask my father for my hand in marriage.

So will I see Mr Darcy again? Well, I'm not sure to be honest. I shall have to ponder it over the weekend and let you all know.

Tuesday, 17 July 2007

Date numero tres

So I think I have another date with The Owl on Friday night. This is somewhat of a milestone for me. The Owl wanted to do something on Sunday as well but I have said I have other plans. As you know, I'm not sure I like him yet.

Friday night will need to be snog night. I will have to get wasted though. I believe after I have snogged The Owl I will be able to decide if I want to continue seeing The Owl. However, I cannot imagine snogging The Owl. I am sure 17 tequilas will help though.

I am still in desperate need of a one night stand. Does one actually have to go out to find one or can one have one delivered to one's doorstep?

Sunday, 15 July 2007

Sunday afternoon dating

Today I had my second date with The Owl. It was supposed to be this morning but I drank too much red wine last night and had to postpone it to 3pm instead. Obviously I still had a get out clause. The idea was for my date to take place from 3-5pm so that I could help my best friend set up his bbq from 5pm. In actual fact our date lasted until 6pm and now, here I am at home, typing my blog. I have no friends who are silly enough to have bbq's on sunday evenings.

Do I like The Owl? Well, I'm not sure. He is rather bright as I've mentioned before but I can't help feeling that I went out of my way to make a bad impression. In fact, I was downright argumentative. But, given he's a barrister that should not be too much of a problem. After all, that's all he does with his time, argue.

I was convinced on parting ways that I would not hear from The Owl again. He is vehemently against drugs so I told him about myself and two friends taking marijuana across the Transkei in our university days and giving the police who pulled us over easter eggs to avoid having our car searched. It worked by the way - they waved us through. Oh - how I long for the days of my youth. Crime had no meaning.

But, I have heard from The Owl already so it appears that I will need to make a worse impression when we next see each other. I shall go dressed as a goth.

You may wonder why I am trying to make a bad impression and to be honest I am wondering the same thing.

Thoughts my fans?

Thursday, 12 July 2007

10am dates

Following my date with The Owl this morning at 10am, I now firmly believe this is the way forward. Each male must be given a one hour time slot. With a firm beginning and end to a meeting, the pressure is off and the escape is all planned.

The Owl was a pleasant surprise. He talks a lot, is rather bright and, dare I say it, quite funny. I may even like him and want to see him again.

I have also now come to the conclusion that I prefer the older looking man. Younger men with boyish good looks scare me. However, the more distinguished gentleman makes me purrr. Oh yes, purrr.

So, here I am at 11.14am purring at my desk.

Lovely.

Wednesday, 11 July 2007

Silence in the Court

I'm back all and although I'd love to say back with a vengeance, it's actually more of a whimper. That said though, I have a new internet boyfriend. My new boyfriend, The Owl, is a barrister. I think he is quite smart. He uses big words I don't completely understand but I find that quite sexy. We have spoken twice on the phone and he texted me daily whilst I was on my summer vacation in Ibiza. I actually found this a bit unsettling since we have never met and realise this could pose serious stalker issues but there is nothing wrong with a bit of text attention...or so I keep on telling myself.

Everything was going very well with The Owl until Sunday. He called me but I just couldn't bring myself to take the call and only called him back on Monday. I sensed a bit of tension. We are supposed to be meeting up on Thursday at some point if he has a break from court but I have not heard a word from him. And this from the man who was texting every day.

I will however put on my sexy black dress tomorrow and wear my hold ups. Oh yes, and decent underwear. Not that he'll be seeing any of that but it's the feeling you know.